Getting Uncomfortable and Gearing up for a Long Summer "Stuck" in Hawaii

There is so much pain going on in our nation right now.  I think about updating my photos and writing a post, and I feel heavy.  How do I write about my easy, comfortable life when my friends and neighbors are unemployed due to COVID-19?  How do I nonchalantly list off our family adventures and moments when  I am so concerned about racism and George Floyd and making sure I am not an Amy Cooper?  How do I speak up when I don't even want my blog public or engage in public discussions via social media when I absolutely hate posting on FB?  It is heavy and I feel a huge responsibility to be informed, teach my kids, and be an influence for change in my community and world.  I love John Mayer so much but the other day, "Waiting on the World to Change" came on and I had to turn it off immediately.  Enough waiting.  Enough.  It is time for me to be actively anti-racist.  I'm starting with education, and I have devoured podcasts from First Name Basis and others.  I've read dozens of articles and had chats with friends and family.  I'm currently reading White Fragility, and I have joined a book club to read about white privilege.  I know that this is a good place to start.  I do not want to finish at the start, though.  That is the part that causes me the most anxiety--trying to decide how to act.  We learned last minute about an opportunity on Saturday to march in a peaceful protest at 11am, and we let it pass because it was going to be tough on the kids to stand in the scorching sun and humidity mid-day and wear masks.  We supported with honks and waves and cheers, but Brady and I wish so much we had not let it pass.  It is good for all of us to feel uncomfortable.

I know it is okay to put it aside and live my daily life, but it still feels flippant to write about lovely summer days, walks, surfs, and friendships when there is so much hurt and despair.  I feel okay living each day but writing about the loveliness has been a roadblock. My goal has been to shut it all down--the angst and the education--by 10pm and watch a 20 minute comedy with Brady.  It's been quite a bit later than that and I have no idea how Brady gets up at 6am every day, but the laughs we get every night from "Life in Pieces" are a huge relief.

Out for an evening stroll, getting our swagger on.  Owen aced it.

We pass this in a nearby neighborhood and laughed at the matching characters.

Mother's Day was so lovely.  Kate woke me up with a bouquet of homemade flowers and letters and even scrabble pieces assembled to display love.  She was gushing with desire to make the day special.    Later in the day, Zachary brought me this collected bouquet of flowers from our neighborhood with a thoughtful note.  I love them so much.

Kate and I made this mousse cake together.  It was outstanding--one of the best chocolate treats I've ever had.

Our motto: fancy desserts, "fancy" plates.

Plate-licking good.  We did not let him see us snag a photo because we don't want this to happen regularly, but the spontaneity of it was so cute.

Kate and Owen on their 1-mile run.

Brady and his fro, getting more out of control every day.

Whale spout!

Owen was emotional one afternoon and wanted to run with Daddy.  Brady went out for his 4 mile run, and I brought the bike with the seat for whenever O pooped out.  He made it 1.5 miles before I forced him in the seat to avoid traffic and let Brady run faster, and Owen wailed about it until he was allowed to run again on the way back.

Kate is officially a Potter fan!  She started on Book 1 in May and is now to book 3.

Another evening doing puzzles.  Somehow, we go to the beach, eat late, and still do puzzles together.

Complete!  I was most excited about this puzzle's vibrant colors.

Clarks drove by and chucked water balloons at us on a Sunday night.  We of course cleaned up all the debris but it was so fun to walk together, socially distanced but finally social.

That same Sunday, Brady got up with the kids, played with them individually, made food, AND wrote a song for Owen.  I felt lazy but mostly grateful that he is a hands-on dad.

Owen has stopped taking naps for the most part so we have a lot of car rides that look like this.  If we could get the poor kid in bed before 8:30pm, he would be happier.

Yay!  The mayor announced that groups of 10 or less were now okay.  We've had 7 weeks without a single COVID-19 case.  Presley moved here just before quarantine started, and knows almost no one. She was in Kate's class and the day we were allowed to legally socialize, she had a playdate.  They decided to make sugar cookies together.

Another day, another 1 mile run.  Zachary is 39 miles into his 100-mile goal (rule: only 1 mile a day counts).

Last day of school was May 28.  I was so grateful to the Koloa teachers and staff.  They rallied together to make a drive-through parade.  It made me misty-eyed.  Ms. Swart was the best teacher Kate has had and she was teary knowing the year was over.

Owen's care package from "Miss Berta"--his preschool teacher.  He misses her so much.

Birthday surf with my surf sister!  The crowds were a little grumpy at Waiohai, so Hilary convinced me to do some First Break waves.  I've had enough scares there that to even paddle out makes me feel courageous.  I had three huge waves out there on my birthday and that was enough to make my day.  Every now and again, I jump in ability level and that was a day for the books.

We've designated Thursday as a National Geographic day.  We pick one documentary and watch it together.  Brady and I are trying hard to keep the kids out of the sun during peak hours, so finding ways to break up the day when the kids are used to beaching for hours in the middle of the day is and will be a summer challenge.

I surfed again with Nic and the kids on my bday night.  Kate and I caught 4 or 5 together at the end.  She was so sweet to stay out and catch with me even though it was dusk and "scary hour" for her.  I came home and walked right into this surprise: Heidi had decorated the house.  This birthday had me feeling all kinds of love.  We finished the night off right with takeout Thai and Zachary made lava cakes.

We did not get enough Hanalei on Memorial Day, and followed it up with another Hanalei day on Saturday.  I'm so happy for these days with so much fun for the kids.  Owen is so comfortable there and played, surfed, and boogie boarded.  Brady and I surfed, and Zac and Kate surfed for hours.

Brady snagged a pic of Nic making a drop without realizing I was on this with him to the right.

Brady finishing off a wave.

Owen trying out Tate's board.  It is smaller and harder to balance on, but he was relatively successful!

Kate and Penelope in matching swimsuits on a matching wave.

Owen's care package from "Miss Berta"--his preschool teacher.  He misses her so much.

We all finally got haircuts when barbershops opened up.  As soon as his locks were gone, Brady started a beard for the first time in his life.

After Hanalei, we took Coconuts takeout to Lydgate for another afternoon of bocce ball.

The following week, I took some kids to the shaded area of the park for outside games.  They each created a Harry Potter broom out of bamboo shoots.

Owen finally earned his flippers after finishing a home preschool chart!

The girls had a trio playdate and heart attacked some neighbors.  They were a little worried about getting caught, so they dressed up so "no one would recognize them."

We are now two weeks into summer and we've still managed to keep up our daily beach trip streak, outside of peak sunshine.  We are disappointed travel for the summer has all been canceled, but recognize that we are beyond lucky to be "stuck" here.